Imagine, if you will, a world where the rules don’t apply. A world where both Keanu Reeves and Patrick Swayze are still both pretty f**king cool. Now top that off with some psychotic ramblings by Gary Busey. What do you get? The coolest movie ever.

Point break first came out a time that is very precious to me: like 1994 or something. I was young ex quarter back who decided that football wasnt enough and I wanted to become a federal agent and- wait a sec that’s not my life. That the plot to this wicked f**king movie. Keeanu reeves plays Johnny Utah a rookie cop who gets his break when he is transferred to the robbery division of the FBI. His partner: Gary busey. The craziest f**k ever. Now I think I can pinpoint exactly when during filming he…i dont know…. he started SMOKING CRYSTAL METH. The other actors must have had a tough time keeping a straight face while busey spouts classic cinema lines like: “I was taking shrapnel in key-sa, when you were shitting on your hands and rubbing it on your face” Like that? How bout this: “I was in the field when you were popping zits on your funny face and jerking off to a goddamn sears catalog” I mean its all classic.

Crazy Busey has this theory that these bank robbers they’ve been chasing are surfers. So its off to the beach for these feds. Keeanu is not at the Matrix point in his career so he’s closer to Bill and Ted then Neo. Its at the beach where he meets a young hottie played by Lori Petty (F**k, she’s hot. Remember tank girl? Ice-t was a kangaroo) and he knows that she’s his in to the surfer life. So to convince her to teach him to surf. He tells her a nice heartwarming tale about how HIS PARENTS ARE DEAD. Total bullshit. She bites and its through her that he meets Patrick Swayze’s character who can convince people with a simple powerful speech to do anything he wants. He convinces a guy full of bullets to jump out an airplane. He’s the David Koresh of surfing. Keanu thinks perhaps swayze is the leader of the robbers. Is he right? Needless to say that’s when the ultimate hair shaking begins.

Anyways, I wont spoil all the movie for ya but I definatley think it’s the ultimate action movie ever made…in 1994…that stars Swayze and Reeves. I will tell you that if you rent this flick: Smoke a joint and maybe have a break halfway through to masturbate.