10,000 B.C.

10,000 B.C. is the reason why people write movie reviews.  To warn people of the truly terrible films out there, like 10,000 B.C.  A review I recently read on www.rottentomatoes.com, by Stefan Birgir Stefansson (http://www.rottentomatoes.com/author/author-6029/about.php#url) said it best:

“crap, and more crap in a crap bucket.”

Roland Emmerich (Independence Day) brings the prehistoric era to life in 10,000 B.C.  It’s the story of a D’Leh (Steven Strait) trying to fulfill his destiny as the savior of his tribe, the Yagahl.  One day his love, Evolet (Camilla Belle) and others from the tribe are kidnapped by mysterious men from another culture.  D’Leh and his guardian, Tic’Tic (Cliff Curtis) embark on a journey to save Evolet and the others, by traveling through new worlds and encountering different creatures and foreign lands.  Can D’Leh restore peace to his people, and become the leader he was born to be?

To put it as politely as I can, this movie stinks.  It makes no sense as it doesn’t even try to be historically accurate, or remotely interesting.  The characters are more or less cardboard cutouts, rather than real people.  You will probably feel more for a digital wooly mammoth that gets killed, than for the characters who are murdered in cold blood.  The acting is terrible, but then again so is the story.  Decent action is padded with moments of boredom that take forever.  The best part of the movie happens in the first ten minutes with a big mammoth chase scene.  It’s shot very well, and is a technical marvel to look at.  However, after that it takes a nose dive off a cliff and never recovers.  It’s almost like a game to see who can make it to the end, I’d bet most don’t.

High Definition is the only way to watch this film, because it does look great in HD.  The crazy animals look as if they could jump right off the screen and into your lap.  But looking good, and being good are two different things.  If your searching for a prehistoric fix or a good action adventure, you can do much better.  10,000 B.C. should end up just like mammoths, extinct.

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